If you’re searching for the one person that will change your life and be with you forever, look in the mirror. tweet
We learn how to love ourselves by our parents
As we become adults, it is almost second nature to understand what a good parent looks. A good parent loves their children, protects them, ensures they get healthy meals and plenty of rest. A good parent accepts their child and encourages their natural gifts and talents. They are quick to defend them against the attacks of others. It’s likely; you could list additional qualities of a good parent. Whether we had a good parent or not we seem to instinctively know.
At the same time, you may not realize that the parenting you received as a child has a huge impact. As a result, it is how you practice self-care or self-love today. In reality, if you weren’t a priority for your parent, you won’t make yourself a priority either. It’s likely; you’ll repeatedly find yourself saying “my needs can wait.” Likewise, if your parent(s) berated you or down-played your abilities/emotions, your inner critic will do the same. The lists of connections between the parenting you received and how it affects your spirit are long. The list is so long, the world of psychology has developed an entire means of addressing these issues known as re-parenting.
Silly and shallow or shameless self-care
While some critics consider the idea of re-parenting stupid (and it’s likely there may be some methods that are), the act of self-care is far from it. With attention to eating nourishing foods, getting plenty of rest, setting healthy boundaries, addressing our emotions, etc. to do otherwise can do serious self-harm. Also, to think that we can hate ourselves (evidenced by the way we treat and talk to ourselves) and still love others is wishful thinking. Even scripture commands we love ourselves.
Grab your journal; it’s your turn to grow
Take a few moments and reflect on your self-love.
- What self-destructive habits do you have? What connections are there to the way you were parented?
- How can you begin to love yourself differently (in a healthier way)?
- Who can you enlist to help you be the true forever valentine you need to help heal any spiritual wounds of childhood?