Flashback before I answer the pool question
My morning meditation ended with the above quote which I shared on Facebook. Notably, it resonated with a lot of people based on the comments and shares. Subsequently, it made me think a little deeper about trust and why I can be so horrible at it at times. Granted I have gotten much better at it over the years.
However, I remember my first job out of college as a manager trainee with a bank. I trusted no one. Namely, I didn’t trust my fellow interns, the different managers I rotated through every few weeks or other employees. Why didn’t I trust? Fear. Would my ideas be stolen? Could my words be twisted and used against me? I might look stupid. The list could go on. Unfortunately, it’s not just my reason for a lack of trust; it’s yours too. Simply put, where there is a lack of trust, there is the presence of fear.
Now to the pool question
To get back to the point, the pool is an analogy for life. Consequently, when we operate in fear we flail around grasping at the water hoping we don’t drown before we get to something to hold on to. Likewise is life. We can pray for a life raft or we can learn to float. While I contend prayer is never a bad idea, learning to float is more in our control. Which us humans love to have control. 😉 In like manner, learning to float boils down to trust. With this in mind, I find five reasons to trust more and fear less and make everyday like a day at the pool.
Five reasons to trust more and fear less
T – Temporary. All things in this life are temporary. Good days, bad days, problems, and promotions. There isn’t a thing you can point to that is not temporary. Thus to not trust is like letting an anchor made of dust drag you to the bottom of the pool.
R – Relax. If the above thought doesn’t help you to relax, then verbally tell yourself to relax. I’ve practiced this technique on nights I can’t get to sleep…slowly telling every part to relax. It works! Also, take the time to do something that relaxes you. Like, taking a walk, reading a book, or even floating in a pool.
U – Unnecessary Fear Eliminated. Identify the fear, make a list of why it’s irrational and another list of how your irrational fears were proven wrong in the past. Also, recall where you have trusted, and things worked well before.
S – Seek to See. Instead of getting lost in the fear, seek to see. Aim to be the observer. Observe without judgment what’s happening, how you feel, potential positive outcomes.
T – Time Reveals the Answer. Not only, does time tell the answer it also reveals the path. Purposefully give yourself a time limit, when you find yourself caught up in the fear. Tell yourself I am not going to worry about this until a specified date. Then set a limit, three days, a week, or whatever feels appropriate for the situation. You’ll be surprised how often our fears will resolve once we choose to let them go.
Grab your journal; it’s your turn to grow.
Take a few moments and reflect on where fear has you flailing at the moment. Grab your journal and answer the following questions.
- Where is lack of trust (fear) keeping me from floating in my career? relationships? personal life?
- Make a list of the fears that you have. Be honest.
- What steps can you take to T-R-U-S-T more?